Facebook Yard Sale Rant: I Finally Met The Picky Mom

Today’s blog post is brought to you by one ridiculously picky mom named Tammy.

Now, Tammy is a special kind of stupid. You should probably know that up front. I had no idea how difficult and picky she would be, otherwise I wouldn’t have attempted to deal with her.

Allow me to clarify. I had a ton of kids clothing taking up space in my attic. I had a yard sale and I sold a lot of it at 50 cents per piece. I didn’t sell it all though, and before I donated it, I decided to try and package it into blind lots and sell it cheap on the Facebook yard sale group.


I put together lot sand priced the clothing at about $0.30 per piece. I had one lot of 35 pieces of clothes that I priced at $10. I immediately had 5 people that were interested. Great! This will go smoothly, right? Wrong.

The first person that was interested didn’t understand how to use Facebook and couldn’t find her “other” folder. Let me just say right now that if you don’t know how to access that, you have no place in a yard sale group.

Next up was Tammy. Good Lord, what did I do to piss God off?? Dear Tamy had PMed me immediately when I posted the clothing lot to say she was interested if the first person fell through. She wanted to know if I had any similar lots in other sizes (price wise, similar). I thought I understood her enthusiasm since I was selling clothes so cheap.

Anyway, Tammy made arrangements to pick up quickly and I thought all was well. She didn’t ask any questions and I didn’t elaborate beyond the posting which consisted of a picture of clothes in a box, a number of items, a size and a price. I naively assumed she knew that for $0.29, the clothes wouldn’t be perfect.

Tammy apparently thought she was buying “like new” condition clothing. I don’t know why she would think that given the price and what comparable lots were attempting to be sold for, but she did. She didn’t ask if the clothes were like new or what, she just assumed that they were.

A couple hours after Tammy picked up the clothes, she messaged me the most dramatic message a grown woman has ever sent on Facebook. She said that the clothes were in awful condition, more than 50% were stained (NOT true. Worn, yes, but NOT stained, I made sure of this before putting the lot on Facebook). There were dramatic frown-face emoji’s and she said several times how she wasted $10. She also said there were maybe 11 pieces in there that she liked, but most were not what she thought she was getting with the blind lot.

We’ll just go ahead and ignore the fact that 11 items for $10 is still a hell of a deal.

I immediately offered Tammy a refund because she seemed like the kind of dramatic bitch that would whine to the admin that the BLIND CLOTHING LOT she bought wasn’t up to her standards. That the $0.29 clothing was *gasp* NOT perfect. Since I had several other items listed on the site, I just offered to refund her. I thought she was local.

Turns out, she was not local. She apparently lives a little over 30 minutes away. Immediately, I thought 2 things:

1.) Why would you drive 30 minutes for a $10 clothing lot? She lives in a more populous area and there are way more yard sale groups near her house. I’m guessing she got blacklisted from them all for being a complete retard. If you’re offended by the word retard, I’m sorry. Not really. Get over it. Maybe call Tammy.

2.) If you have been blacklisted and have to drive 30 minutes to buy stuff form another yard sale area, for the love of baby Jesus, why wouldn’t you look at what you bought IN YOUR MOTHER FUCKING CAR before driving home? I mean seriously, even when I’m doing a porch pickup that’s 5 minutes away, I inspect the shit before I leave money. She could have easily checked it out, decided she didn’t want it, put it back and taken back her money. Done. No, that would not have been dramatic enough.

To make matters more fun, I got the distinct impression that she wanted to keep the 11 items she liked and get a partial refund.

I don’t think Tammy understands how these mixed lots work. You put your less desirable crap together with the stuff that will sell and you sell it all at once for real cheap to get it out of your house. The people buying it get a great deal (come on, 29 cents per piece!) and they pick what they want. They can either donate the rest or sell it for a couple bucks. She said she liked about 11 items. That’s still less than $1 per piece! That’s still less than she’d pay at the local consignment shop. Call it a win! Sell the other 24 items for $5 and you’re getting an even better deal!

Again, I just don’t get it. If my items were “like new” (which is what she apparently thought she was buying), doesn’t she think I’d have taken them down to our local children’s consignment store and sold them there? I’m sure I would have gotten more than 29 cents a piece if I had done that and I wouldn’t have to contend with finding a time that works for me and dealing with some random crazy woman.

Anyway, I told her I’d refund all of her money if she brought back ALL of the clothes. Once she was done griping about how inconvenient that was, she agreed to it. Less than 30 minutes later, she had to cancel, saying her daughter was sick and that the pediatrician wanted her to go to the hospital.

I was heading out of town that day, so I said ok, we’ll connect another time next week. Less than 2 hours later, she messages me and says oh hey, I know you said you were busy tomorrow, but can you just put out the money and I’ll leave the stuff?

The woman really is an idiot. We were planning on a porch exchange again. If I was home to put the money out, I wouldn’t have told her that I wouldn’t be available to put the money out for her. I would have just done it. Besides, wasn’t her daughter in the hospital??

So, long story short, 3 days after the initial exchange, she brought back the box of clothes and took her money. I blocked her on Facebook so I never accidentally sell something to her again. I sell a lot of things on those yard sale sites, including fresh eggs. I would hate for her to buy some eggs and then want to return them because she thought I was selling jumbos and they were only larges or something ridiculous like that. From my experience, bad buyers are better off banned!

So there you have it. Some people are just crazy and shouldn’t be allowed in the yard sale groups.


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