Blogging Challenge (Day 30): Kohls

This is the last post in my blogging challenge, so yay for that! I only missed 1 day – not too bad.

Now, on to the real news. Kohls.

Oh, my God, I hate them. I used to love them and now I hate them. Their new policies and promotions make me want to strangle myself if that’s possible. It’s the most frustrating company ever and they outsource their “help” to people that struggle with reading and writing. That’s so much fun when you’re using an online chat system!

Screen Shot 2015-12-14 at 2.06.26 PM

On Black Friday, I did their STUPID FUCKING PROMOTION for small appliances that had rebates attached. OH MY GOD. I wish I had just taken the money and bought a belt to go hang myself. What an annoyance that has been.

The promotion required me to fill out 3 identical rebate forms found on receipt paper. Then, I had to rip off the UPCs from the boxes and include those in envelopes with the little rebate receipts and forms and mail the whole shit-show in.

I did that. All 3 in one envelope, because WHAT FUCKING COMPANY HAS MORE THAN 1 ADDRESS FOR REBATES?!!? NOBODY!

So of course, that was wrong. I didn’t think to read the size 6 point font on all of the receipts to carefully compare the numbers of the P.O. boxes to make sure they were the same.

It turns out that 1 of the 3 items were supposed to be mailed to a different address. Ok, simple mistake… should be easy to fix, right? WRONG!

I got on the chat and explained to the person that I mailed 3 rebates in together, 2 were received and processed, but the 3rd was supposed to go somewhere else. I asked if it would be forwarded to the correct department or if their policy was to just throw incorrectly addressed rebates away.

She told me she could easily change my address.

Fantastic, but that’s not what I asked.

I repeated my request. She asked when I mailed the rebates in. I told her about a week ago and the first 2 were received on 12/12.

She said I just needed to send it through my friend’s account.


I repeated my question. I had a sinking feeling that if this nitwit was handling the rebate, I wouldn’t be seeing the 2 that were already processed either.

She came back and told me that because my rebate was sent to the wrong address, it was not valid for the promotion.

It was like chatting with a team of Mensa members. I was shocked and astounded, but not in a good way.

I understand that, so what did they do with the rebate? Does it say? Did they toss it out or send it on to the correct department for processing?

She told me to mail it in its own envelope.

I kindly (ok, not so kindly) told her that I did not have the UPC, rebate receipt or form to mail, because I’d already sent it in to the wrong address.

Make a copy.

Of what??? MY ASS?? I’ve gotten more intelligent answers from my 3 year old.

I finally told her I just wanted to know if the toaster rebate had been thrown away or not. She said she did not know.

Well thanks, I’m so glad I killed 40 minutes on the chat with you for that enlightening answer. You could have led with that and saved us both the trouble.

So Kohls, for your pain-in-the-ass rebates and stellar outsourcing of your customer service, I’d like to award you with the “FUCK YOU” award.

It almost makes shopping at Walmart seem enjoyable.


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