Gulp: We’re Cutting Cable

We’re finally doing it – we’re cutting cable. After talking about it for over 2 years, we’re finally breaking free of Dish. They raised our bill from $47/month to $52/month in January (yearly $5 price hike) and then in March they raised it to $95 because “customer credits” expired. I got those credits the last time they raised it to $80 and I tried to leave.

This time, the best they could do was $65 if I didn’t want to downgrade my package. We could get back down to $52 if I wanted to get rid of basically every channel we watch (mostly kid channels and Hallmark. Don’t judge me.)

We shopped around with various cable providers and they all came to over $100/month for cable and internet. Right now we pay $35 for internet, so that’s still quite a cable bill. It seems like wherever we go we would be paying about $65 for cable.

There’s a lot of things you can do with $65/month instead of paying for cable. Here’s what we decided to do:

$8.34/month for Amazon Prime (I’m buying 12 months all at once for a little discount)
$10/month for Netflix (2 screens)

Total: $18.34/month

We have a couple of Roku players and can watch shows on ABC and other major networks about a week after they air for free. We might also get an indoor antennae since we are between 3 major cities. At this rate, we can also splurge on streaming movies, Red box and DVDs each month and still be ahead of what we would be with cable. Amazon prime is mostly for buying streaming content and 2-day shipping our DVD selections.

Some friends also recommended that I look into a streaming service called Kodi, but I haven’t done that yet.

So, if you’ve cut cable, what has your experience been like? Can you offer any advice? Do you think my Roku will cut it? We also have a 3rd generation Apple TV, but it seems pretty limited — no Amazon Prime on that.

Verizon FIOS: Why You So Shady?

Dear Verizon FIOS,

WTF? No, seriously – What the actual fuck is wrong with you? Your employees are striking and I’m about ready to stand out there with them. Your customer service is abysmal and I’m not talking about the people working the online chat (though truthfully, WHY DO THEY TYPE SO SLOWLY?). I’m talking about how you, the company, has decided to treat your customers.

Take my most recent bill as an example. I’m enrolled on auto pay and all that happy bullshit, probably because I had to be in order to a $1 discount off my bill. This month I log-in on the day the payment is scheduled to be deducted and see that it has jumped to $84.99 for internet.

Last month it was $39.99.

What gives? Apparently some promotional offer I had ran out. Without warning. And since services are paid for after they are rendered, I can’t disagree with the charge and quit before I rack up a bill that’s more than twice what I’m used to.

I immediately got online and used your chat system. After waiting what felt like an eternity for your associate to type her response to my first question – Can you get my price back to what it was before I jump ship to Comcast? – I was told yes, I can choose this new plan at $34.99/month for months 1-12 and $44.99/month for months 12-13.

So I said sure, sign me up. Meanwhile I’m wondering WHY DID YOU MESS WITH MY SHIT?! Why not just leave it at $40/month instead of dicking me around and then making me pay $35 for 12 months and then $45 for 12 months? It still averages out to $40/month, asshole!

So now I’m paying basically the same amount as before, you’re getting basically the same amount as before and save for the 1 weird month where you’re gouging me for twice my normal payment, we’re right where we were… except I hate you. And I will spread my hate for you far and wide all over the internet… which I’m accessing through your company.

I hope the striking workers win and I hope Verizon has to pay dearly. Assholes.

The Complete Guide to Lowering Your Cable Bill

Guys, I’m going to be honest with you for a minute – I don’t pay full price for cable. Actually, I don’t pay anything for cable, since I have satellite, but for the purpose of this post, we’re going to say satellite = cable.

Are you still with me? Good. Forget about the whole satellite = cable thing for a minute and focus on the point of this post – lowering the cable bill. That got your attention? I thought so.

It turns out, getting your bill lowered really isn’t all that hard. In fact, you can even get it lowered even if you’re under contract if you just know what to say. Follow along and soon you’ll be negotiating your cable prices like a pro.

Step 1.) Know the competition. If you live in an area with more than one cable service available, know what the other guys are offering. If there’s any deals or promos going on, get those handy. I live in an area where cable companies are routinely offering gift cards for the amount of the early termination fee you’ll pay your current provider if you cancel your contract to switch cable companies. Knowledge is power, so see what’s out there before you begin? 

If you live in the boonies, you’re not out of luck! Satellite is cable’s competitor too and satellite is available pretty much anywhere. Look up the deals available in your town.

Step 2.) Name drop. When you call, tell the operator you’re thinking of switching to X company because they have a promotion going that can save you money. Ask if they can match the price for you so you don’t have to go through the hassle of switching. Often times, they will. If that works, you’re done. If it doesn’t work…

Step 3.) Threaten to quit. Tell them you want to speak with someone in the cancellation or retention department regarding terminating your services. Often, people in these departments have access to way better deals than the level 1 customer service reps. Don’t give up your quest for cheaper cable if your first attempt isn’t successful.

When you get on the phone with the person in the cancellation or retention department, tell them you’re thinking about canceling your cable if you can’t get a lower monthly bill. Make sure you tell them you don’t want to lower any of your services either. Usually, you’ll get a loyalty discount or something at this point.

Step 4.) Follow-Up. Ask the person when your discount ends and how you can renew it at that point. They’ll probably tell you to call back in 6 months or however long and ask for the ___ discount again. Write that down. Cable companies keep the names of these discounts under lock and key. Knowing that you want a “customer loyalty” discount versus a “$10 off discount” can make your next call go a lot smoother.

Step 5.) Cancel the cable. If you can’t get a lower bill, go ahead and cancel your service, as long as you’re not charged a fee. Most cable companies will call you within a week with a follow-up and try to get you to go back to their service. They usually offer you a good promotional discount to get you back as a customer.

Of course, if you’re just sick of getting jerked around, you can always switch providers at this point and take advantage of whatever other deals there are available to you.

You don’t have to pay an arm and a leg for cable. Negotiating for a better rate isn’t difficult, but it does take time and a little bit of perseverance. Call your cable provider today and see if you can lower your bill $5, $10 or even more.